There are parents. All sorts. Each one exhibiting. One is the sort that shares corny quotes on Social Media. Another is the sort that read these quotes and thinks… are we doing this right? And yet another is the sort that read these quotes and thinks… who wrote this baloney? “Don’t just teach kids how to count. Teach them what counts.”
Values?! As if parenting wasn’t hard enough already:
In fact, it is far easier to teach them how to count. 2 + 2 = 4 always. But telling the truth …mmm, not always so good.
Oh, the innumerable occasions when I tell people I did not answer their call because my phone was on silent mode and my children remind me (in front of them) that it did ring. Loudly. I just didn’t answer it.
Counting is far easier.
Biting my tongue to stop myself from lying in front of them, well, hurts.
“Always do what is right even when no one is looking.”
My child comes home from school every day, and I repeat every day, with either his pencils, erasers, sharpener, or color pencils missing. It gets quite exasperating.
Reminders and threats have failed:
I was recently updated by him that they had a Lost & Found Box in the class where the teacher would put in all the things left behind after class. He very seriously told me he checked the box and saw loads of pencils and erasers but none were his.
Urgh. Just take one. Anyone.
Nah, I just bite my tongue.
And on occasions when he comes back from school and proudly announces, “Mommy, I did not lose anything today. But I gave my pencil away to X because he lost his…” I bite my tongue even harder.
“The more we share, the more we have”, they say.
Not in this case. We don’t.
But I bite my tongue instead.
Big signage outside my boys’ school has the quote about being the “kid who can get along”.
A child in my sons’ class has turned out to be quite the bully. He goes around calling the other children names, snatching their pencils and erasers, pushing and pinching them, and throwing away the water from their water bottles. The children are rather traumatized.
Parents of the victims have met the teacher, met the boys’ parents and both parties have counseled the boy.
In my head, I tell my son, “You have been learning Martial Arts for over a year now. Won’t it just be easier to wallop the boy when he is mean to you rather than come home to whine?”
Instead, I repeat the quote to him and tell him to “be the nice kid”.
(Who writes these corny lines anyway?)
“Behind every child who believes in themselves is a parent who believed first…”
Not really. Sometimes the child believes first.
My friend’s son believes he can sing very well. To us, he sounds like a cat in labor.
The boy was very keen on taking part in a singing competition and I advised her to let him.
She hasn’t forgiven me since.
Sitting in that auditorium, I had to bite my tongue hard to stop myself from laughing. I haven’t forgiven myself either.
“If you can dream it you can do it” – my childhood dreams of becoming Spider-Man.
“Respect others not because of who they are but because it’s who you are.”
My sons walk into a friend’s house. I follow them. They greet their friend then go on to shake hands with his parents and grandparents. They see the house-help mopping the floor nearby and go and shake hands with her.
I bite my tongue.
In my head, I explain to them the social structure. In my own conscience, I find no words to justify it.
I remain silent.
“Being kind is never wasted…”
Yes, it made for a hilarious FB post!
My children were 4 years old when we were out in a busy place. A young girl came by wearing very distressed/torn jeans. I checked the brand. Expensive.
“Mommy, her clothes are all torn – can you buy her something new?” chirped my son much to the embarrassment of the young lady and amusement of the others.
I am still wondering who wrote such baloney…
Raising children with the right values is not easy in times of valuations. But as some baloney writer correctly wrote, “Life doesn’t come with a manual. It comes with a Mother.” One who has “bite marks on her tongue from all the things she never said.”
About Dragon Mommy: She is an IIM alumna who left the corporate world after 15 long years to raise her twin sons in a small town because she wanted to enjoy the simple pleasures of motherhood. Besides she didn’t really have a very successful career in the city. She is single by choice. Not hers. She used to be fun. Now she writes about parenting.
Did you enjoy my post? Write to me in the comments if you’d like me to share your story! We can connect over an email if I hear you say ‘I have bite marks on my tongue from all the things I never said!’